Being a special needs parent is exactly how it sounds. Something special! At first it may sound overwhelming, confusing and doubtful. You may feel as if you are doing everything wrong. You may feel lost because it’s a whole new world of doctors, appointments, and patience. You may feel as if you don’t know where or who to turn to for advice. Everyone around you has a different opinion and may not have the experience of having a special needs kiddo. Well, let me tell you about the beginning of my journey with Liz and hopefully you will feel a little relieved in knowing you are not alone.
First things first.
DENIAL! You start looking up what exactly is the diagnosis given. Can it be “cured”? Are there case studies and trials? I need more proof this is the correct diagnosis. Let’s look up doctors that are “more” experienced. This can’t be.
DENIAL! You start looking up what exactly is the diagnosis given. Can it be “cured”? Are there case studies and trials? I need more proof this is the correct diagnosis. Let’s look up doctors that are “more” experienced. This can’t be.
PANIC! It’s unavoidable to feel fear. To feel as if the world is coming down on you. To feel afraid of doing things wrong because you believe you are not prepared to do what is necessary for your special kiddo.
BLAME! voidable t What did I do wrong? It was my fault because during pregnancy I may have done this or that. My genes are most likely the faulty ones. I am probably getting karma because I really screwed up in the my early days.
RESEARCH! Now, you seek advice from family and friends only to realize they may not share the same feelings as you since they have never gone through it. You seek for help online, read books, go to support groups. Read blogs of parents like me who may be able to guide you.
CHANGE! You realize that YOU are enough, you realize that you are not to be blamed. This beautiful child is much more than you think. Your life will begin to change in ways you never imagined. A new level of compassion for others will grow inside of you. Your newborn‘s milestones as simple as a smile, will give you butterflies in your tummy. LOVE will grow so deep! You start becoming a whole new person with enlightenment and appreciation to what entails to be a special needs parent.
ADVOCACY! ill You feel you need to make a difference! You want to be involved in everything. You want to be the voice and spread awareness. You want to make their lives better.
AND this last stage is where I stand my dear special parent. Advocacy! To help those around me feel there’s a path. There’s no need to feel alone and lost. Let our journey be of some guidance and hope if you need it. Trust that everything will be ok.
You ARE enough for your kiddo.
You WILL find ways to make their lives easier.
You CAN do this!
~Shirley~